Why Steve Jobs Resigned

Steve Jobs resigned. We know that. But everyone is wondering why. Well, I have a theory. It is somewhat speculative, but I can assure you my theory is supported by plenty of evidence. Basically, Steve Jobs was sick of holding up crappy, over-priced products while wearing jeans and an out of style shirt. It was the combination of all three factors that convinced him to leave. He would have stayed on if they just made him hold up crappy products and look excited.

But Apple wanted more. They wanted him to wear jeans and an out of style shirt while he held up the crappy, over-priced products. Personally, I see nothing wrong with Steve's decision. In fact, I would have done the same thing. To be honest, I don't think I could have even mustered the feeble facial expressions that he managed while holding up the crappy, over-priced products.

On second thought, if Apple made me hold all that shit up while wearing out of style shirts and jeans, I would have hired large animals to sodomize every employee of the company.